Niches

I had a couple of lovely comments on yesterday's post. Kathy spoke of finding a niche and Jo of deciding what I want to write about and then writing about it. Putting these together I realised that I was slipping into a mind set of trying to please some unknown readership, trying to reach some uncertain standard, trying to be liked. I haven't figured out my niche yet, and I don't always write about what is important to me because I am afraid, afraid of offending, afraid of being too vulnerable, afraid of what people who know me will think. I have not allowed myself to settle into my very own niche and have instead tried to define my content to beign with and have written to that specification.
I have kept very quiet about my Christian faith and the incredible journey that God has been leading me on, especially in these last months, and perhaps that is why this blog has become harder to write.
I keep very quiet about my running, another important part of my life.
Since term started my husband has been working a six-day week and he is currently on a school trip. I feel bad even mentioning that as one of my very dear friends is coping on her own with three little ones as her husband begins a tour of duty in a war zone, but I do find it hard to get so little time on my own. In the last 36 hours I have sat with friends as they have needed to talk and I have spent time on the phone with two mums of newborns. I have raced for my running club and I have cooked for, washed for and 'educated' three children. I have not had the opportunity to have much time for myself.
Blogging has become a few snatched moments and I want to find ways of making more time for it because I enjoy writing and it is something just for me. It feels like growing.
So, this is what I'm going to do:
I'm going to find or make more time to write, especially when these mad first days of September are done.
I'm going to write more about my faith, my relationship with Jesus, my running as well as Home Ed and my children.
I'm going to explore what I want to write and see if I can find my niche.

In the meantime, I need to make a confession.
We have two resident spiders and I am getting quite fond of them but my husband would rather we removed them to the wild outdoors. One lives in a hole in one door frame and the other, at the opposite end of the room, in a worrying large crack around the another door frame. They come out in the dark and are obviously 'jumping on things' spiders rather than 'catching things in a web' spiders.
Yesterday, I found one in the sink. This was proof to me of what I have heard, that they do not come up the drain pipe but fall in and can't get out: it tried over and again to scale the shiny walls but slithered down each time. The children and I had a look at it and then captured it with the cup and card technique. This, surely, was a perfect moment to introduce it to its natural environment.
After some thought I put it back on the wall next to its crack. It stopped for a while, cleaned its feet (that was interesting to watch - I guess they had something from the sink on them) and then disappeared into its home with, I like to think, a sigh of relief.
Sorry love. Yes, I did have it in a cup. Yes, I could have taken it in the garden. Yes, I put it back. What can I say - you love me 'cos I'm a softy!!