Give someone you love a hug

I came across an article yesterday on how chimps conslole their friends with a hug or a stroke if the friend has just lost out in a fight. This, according to the scientists, reduces the stress level of the victim and is evidence that chimps can experience empathy.

"This is something often thought to be a unique trait to humans, so
understanding the link between consolation and stress reduction in chimpanzees
is an important step towards understanding whether or not chimpanzees are
capable of this level of empathy."

It strikes me that understanding the link between consolation and stress reduction in humans is important too. As a Breastfeeding Counsellor, one thing I make sure I bring up plenty in the antenatal sesssions I lead is the importance and benefit of skin-to-skin contact with new-born babies. It's not just that it feels nice, but it has a measurable effect on calming a baby's heart-rate, temperature and level of crying. It releases soothing hormones in mum too.

Steven Biddulph, in his book 'The Secret of Happy Children', discusses the post World War 2 problem of caring for the thousands of orphans whose parents had either been killed or permanently separated from them by war. Some were put into field hospitals with state of the art facilities. Some were left in remote mountain communities and left in the arms of the village women. The children left in rural homes thrived much better that those left in the hospitals.

"The infants in the field hospital had everything but affection ... the
babies in the villages had more hugs ... than they knew what to do with."

He goes on to say that in an audience of 60 adults, they all raised their hands to say they got less affection then they would like in daily life.

A friend of mine has had the experience of visiting a Romanian orphanage where adults with learning difficulties have been institutionalised since infancy. She tells me of their desperation for physical contact of any kind. She would massage their hands and told me how they would hold their hand or even their feet out to her whenever they saw her, so important was it to them to have a loving, gentle touch. Any touch.

I'm going to give my children a big hug. I'm going to hug my husband when he gets in from work and my friend when I go round for supper later. I need hugs and I'm sure they do to!