I have completely ground to a halt. We have been on holiday exactly one week now and I have reached a level of apathy/relaxation that I don't remember experiencing for a long time. Simple tasks like providing basic meals, making the beds and persuading the children to get dressed are about the pinnacle of my achievements. Despite finding this lovely cafe open every day with internet access, even the thought of blogging has become too much for me!
The pace of life has become snail-like and worrying about my training for an up-coming half-marathon, September's curriculum, how to develop my writing, how to eat better, lose weight, deepen my spirituality and generally be a better person seems distant and even irrelevant. I have realised that this is the first time my family have been away, just the five of us, ever. We have holidayed with friends and extended family before but never just us. We are enjoying each other's company and cross words are far fewer than at home.
I suspect that there is a connection between the two - between the relaxed pace and the enjoyment of being together.
It feels good, I wish I could bottle it!
2 comments:
It sounds to me like you are doing a really good job of being a better person even if the rest of the list is on holiday. Though I suspect true rest will also help with a lot of those other ones.
As a good friend of yours I can only say how good it is to hear you sound so relaxed - although I know exactly how you feel when you describe that feeling of apathy and somehow I can't quite let go of that guilty feeling that say's - 'you'll never get back into doing all the things you need to fit in from September!' and 'but what do you mean you're tired? You haven't earnt that right today!!'
But slowly, slowly I'm beginning to realise that just maybe, rather than all the running around either completing the tasks on my 'to do' lists or trying to remember all those vital things that absolutely must be completed today and need to go onto the sacred list, this is what God intended life to be about - "IN RETURNING AND REST YOU SHALL BE SAVED; IN QUIETNESS AND CONFIDENCE SHALL BE YOUR STRENGTH" (Isiah 30:15).
So now, with this in mind, rather than turning to my timetable that I've written out for myself, to ensure that I get everything completed this morning before 12noon that absolutely MUST be done by then (like my all important 15mile run and some planning for September!), I'm going to make myself a cup of tea, sit on the patio and stare at an unspoilt view of Swaledale that beats any postcard I've ever bought, and just be...
P.S. Hope you're having fun Gaynor. Thinking of you all xx
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